TLDR: short term memory loss, apathy yet decisiveness, psychological expansion, hope.
Introduced back in the 90s in college, along with other recs 💊 as part of the London clubbing scene.
Lots of commercial hash about at the time which was demotivating in hindsight.
The weed mostly skunk and I remember fondly the laughs had, and epiphanies too.
I was a late teenager and combined with hallucinogens and later spiritual practices had some kind of brain rewiring that was terrifying and awe inspiring.
I’d quit for nearly 20 years before trying again about 4 year ago but that grew and I’ve been consuming and experimenting daily since lockdown. I even grew my own - 3 solo cups of StarDawg, Black Hulk and Easy Bud. Well proud!
I’ve always been sensitive and having a more psychedelic experience wasn’t uncommon. Even on tiny one hitters and I had a year of not only having a tiny tolerance but intense highs that were mostly bringing my subconscious to the surface and tbh all hell broke loose in all areas of my life. Like psychedelics, if you are of the persuasion to be interested in the big questions or have a past that’s traumatic, then it’s going to make you face it and give you the stark reality of the human experience.
I’ve been able to work through it but I fear for the masses who are embarking on their inner journeys unprepared. Not my circus but I have a heart and an understanding that the truths revealed can be devastating to the mind as well as freeing, perhaps providing the liminal space for humans to evolve that’s drowned out by this materialistic and oppressive world.
I love being high. It’s addicting for me. The escape. The creativity and ability to think and pose multi-angled concepts is simply exhilarating and I believe can help solve some of our most challenging problems globally, and locally in our families - my wife hates it but prefers me on it for example. Her hate is ignorance mind.
I’ve realised that for me, daily is more about tolerance, habit and escape. It’s our choice but you have to live with the costs and as someone said, the weeks and years go by and one can be happy with just taking life in… philosophically, I do have issues with this so I’m looking to be more ritualistic and purposeful with it as well as have moments when just to enjoy and experiment.
I’ve been shocked by the tolerance build up which really became noticeable after I found LB 🤣 seems a waste as I found in the last 2 months that the high doesn’t hit as hard or as long and that sucks ‘cause you feel like you’re chasing the buzz but it’s not, it’s the escape for me, but I’m aware of it, and I’m in control.
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