i knew a lesbian hooker that would eat like 4 boxes in a morning

There's a lot of scum that you never even see in your life except maybe beyond staring at them from inside your nice car. Some of them are fucking evil but most are just crazy from birth or much more often from drugs. I spend most of my (fully awake) life with them, and its not just me but also all of the cops around me, my partners my friends even my bosses so all of the time this shit is right in your face - either first hand or second hand. So you pick up on it pretty quick especially the funny stuff because thats a sure way to cope and it is very, very often like a reality show. In a sense we are all acting. And It's not the kind of act anybody really wants to live with 24/7 its insanely jaded and broken and the language is severe all the time.

All this shit is why cops basically can only hang with other cops they're the only people that would want to hang out with all the inevitable baggage of a relationship, except family. In both cases it's simply because we are stuck together, so yeah maybe a woman like my wife could have done better.

you want hookers dude?

Yes I shot and killed an armed suspect that was threatening bystanders when we finally cornered him at a big box store. Realize that this is the exception, most LAPD officers never fire their weapons over the course of their entire careers.

Like most city employees we get discounts at theme parks and places like that. Many small businesses treat us to small stuff like a cup of coffee. Nobody has offered me anything big like a trip. The perks suck versus a lot of other jobs.

Street cops have a different ethos than detectives but we do blow off many things: its how we exercise our judgment. Its much more valuable to the system often than letting you off the ticket (though this happens more often and in weirder ways than you can imagine). But it doesn't work that way for my clients if you ask me to do something I will get it done or tell you why I cant, we are agreement bound as individuals.